the only domestic instinct my parents have managed to pass on to me is the tendency to hoard multiple plastic bags in another plastic bag despite the fact that I will probably never need this many plastic bags in my adult life
You guys I’m in Disney World and this afternoon my blood sugar dropped so low I got separated from my family and somehow bought an ice cream and then blacked out and woke up on a bench with chocolate sauce all over my arms and Mickey Mouse putting a cold towel on my head this truly is a magical place.
some people’s voices are just very appealing. you can’t explain it. there is no way to describe it. it’s just like. how. why. why does your voice do things to me. why does it make me feel things. why. how. why
in my senior drama class i had to play gordon ramsay for a film project but we could only film in school so we had to try to find a closed off room to use. the thing is the room wasn’t exactly soundproof and apparently someone heard us and that’s the story of how the vice principal and four freshmen walked in on me wearing a chef’s hat and yelling at my friend because her squid was so raw i could still hear it telling spongebob to fuck off